Crystle Stewart, Miss USA, Advances Study of Physics at Miss Universe Pageant
Going LikeSixty , Monkey: Jul 14 2008
Made Popular Jul 14 2008

Miss USA chose a large audience to demonstrate her love of science - especially physics. Following up on last year’s contestant in the Miss Universe pageant, Rachael Smith, Stewart decided that education our children is more important that winning some stupid pageant.

So she fell down. On stage. In a dress. During the pageant.
After all, Miss South Carolina Teen has all the map needs for the world kids covered. There is a need for more physics education.
So in just a few seconds she demonstrated:

* it takes less energy to knock over a straw than a donut.
* a body in motion will stay in motion unless you are wearing ten inch heels on ice, then Gravity Rules!
* the time to hit the floor is inversely proportional to the time for a big goofy grin to appear when dragging what is left of your (m)ass up to it’s original height of five feet.
* Getting kidnapped pays higher dividends than “ass”trophysics.

However, it appears that the new Miss Universe, Danaya Bana Bo-bana, from “oil-rich-Venezuela” told host Jerry Springer that she had a new physics theory that she was studying.
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The Size of the Eyes is Directly Proportional to the Size of the Surprise: Do Winners Really Practice Their OH Faces Prior to Pageants?

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